I pastor many people of many different ages. One of the realities of age is the changes it brings in our bodies on spiritual, mental, physical and hormonal levels. Everyone is affected in some way, some more than others.
The norm for anyone has to be walked through with grace, wisdom and whatever help one can find to deal with whatever their new issues the seasons of life may bring. Injuries, health challenges of disease, sickness etc can impact the whole person.
Our sex lives are obviously impacted, altered or injured by all these realities. One’s psychological life impacts one’s sex life too. All kinds of life events, abuses or stages can influence this part of ourselves and our marriages.
So even in our attempts to foster healthy and fruitful marriages, we also know that it looks different for each person or couple.
What doesn’t change is the fact that every person in a marriage is supposed to attend to the needs of their spouses.
How you figure that out has to be navigated with love, understanding, intentionality and selfless care for one another.
If you run into dead ends, difficult issues, problems of heart, mind or body, that is where reaching out to professionals that focus on your mental, physical, sexual or relational health can be the next step. Doing nothing and not attending to one’s self or the other, is not caring for each other in a loving way.
We live in an amazing time where one can find a lot of help for things that used to be hidden in silence, shame, stubbornness or sin.
Open and honest communication in a gentle and helpful way can ease the embarrassment, release the tension of unexplained actions or patterns, bring light to lonely darkness, attend to unmet needs, reorient sexuality back into togetherness; instead of unhealthy or unsatisfying alternatives and bring the couple back together in heart, body and soul.